Eastbourne author’s insight on break-ups

Eastbourne author Munir Bello
Eastbourne author Munir Bello

An Eastbourne author and website founder has uncovered new research which shows dithering men need one month to summon-up the courage to break-up with their girlfriends, whereas women require just six days to do the deed.

Munir Bello, the founder of SheLeft.me, a tongue-in-cheek website for lovelorn men and women and the author of The Break-up Recipe, says the findings are based upon the feedback of 500 unmarried couples in both short and longer-term partnerships. In a straw poll, they were asked how they would theoretically react if their current relationship “went sour”, or if either party fell “out of love or lust”.

Munir said, “From the moment they start to feel unhappy, it takes most blokes 30 days to bring a relationship to an end and two thirds of that is spent “agonising” over the decision often with friends, and usually always in a pub and plotting the most tactful method of delivery. The remainder is spent “building-up the nerve” to actually do it.

“Women, on the other hand, are considerably more decisive. By and large, they are able to ditch their relationships – and go from “unhappy to untroubled” - in a fraction of the time.

“The fairer sex is not more heartless but it possesses more ‘get up and go’ and emotional honesty to make a snap decision, respondents said.

“They are also more sensitive to their partner’s feelings, and believe a ‘short sharp shock’ is less painful than a long, drawn-out separation.

“It could be that men are generally less proactive than women, and that they lack the confidence to put a break-up plan – painless or otherwise – into action. Or it could be that men are born romantics who want nothing more than to stay with their sweethearts for ever.

“ Either way, women appear to be more adept at going from unhappy to untroubled in relationship terms.

“The difference between men and women when it comes to relationships appears to be stark. Men are happy to roll along whereas women are focused on long-term happiness.”